Clueless
by BlackWingedAngel-Lucifer
Summary: When Shuuichi stumbles across some papers in Yuki's desk that Yuki didn't want Shuuichi to find, things turn upside. Life as they know it has gone haywire if it wasn't like that before. Shuuichi is torn and Yuki disappeared from his life. Shuuichi's all a
1. oblivious

Gravitation   
Title: Clueless  
Disclaimer: Sadly, I do not own Gravitation  
A/N: I'm sorry to all of my fans but I couldn't find the papers I wrote the sequel to Makeikusa and so there will be no sequel until I find them. I'm sorry for making you all wait so long without notice. In the meanwhile, I wrote this story to keep my fans busy. Hope you like it. I want to thank all of my fans for sticking with me until the end of that story and hope you will continue to support me and give me determination. All reviews are appreciated, bad and good alike. Please continue to review! THANKYOU!

Chapter 1: Oblivious

Normal POV

"Yuki! I'm home! Sorry I'm late. I was going to hang out with Hiro tonight but I decided to come

home because I missed you!" Shuuichi said happily while bouncing up and down all around the

room. "I wish you went with Hiro. I could care less if you come home late." Yuki mumbled and

hoped Shuuichi didn't hear him otherwise he's have to sit through another one of his crying fits.

"But didn't you miss me too?" Shuuichi did here Yuki's remark. To Yuki's surprise, Shuuichi

didn't whine or complain this time. Yuki didn't answer. He really didn't have an excuse since he

didn't expect Shuuichi to hear him. If he did, Yuki thought Shuuichi would cry and then he could

kick him out if he didn't shut up. Shuuichi let it drop since he thought that it would end up in the

two of them fighting. He walked over to Yuki and stood behind him. Yuki either didn't seem to

care or forgot Shuuichi was there otherwise he would've kicked him out of his study by now. Now

that Shuuichi was standing behind Yuki, he had a perfect view of everything the writer was

writing down. Unfortunately, Yuki realized this and didn't want Shuuichi to read anything.

"Shuuichi, did you eat yet?" He made some excuse, any excuse, to get Shuuichi away from

him. "Nope. Are you hungry, Yuki? I'll make us something!" Shuuichi volunteered happily,

forgetting what he just read. "No, you'll either burn something or the food won't come out tasting

good. I'll help you." "Yuki, you don't usually help me with things. YAY!" Shuuichi danced around

the room.  
--------------------

After getting through dinner, it was already late and Yuki decided to go to sleep early since he

pulled an all nighter the night before. Shuuichi stayed up all night playing video games, as usual.

When he did get tired, he was ready to fall asleep in the spot he was sitting in while playing the

games. However, he remembered those papers he saw Yuki writing before.Yuki doesn't usually

handwrite things because he types it on his laptop. That must mean it's something important if

he hand wrote it. Shuuichi snuck quietly into the study and rummaged around in all the papers

in the desk. They weren't in the draws so they had to be on the desk but it was empty. Then,

Shuuichi saw a blue spiral notebook sitting on top of the laptop. There were papers inside of it.

The ones Shuuichi saw before. He took the papers along with the notebook and sat down in the

chair to read it. Not even half way finished with half the paper, Shuuichi knew what he was

reading and didn't like it. It hurt him deeply. Shuuchi got so mad that he felt like ripping it to

pieces but didn't because he wanted to read on and find out more. Shuuichi always did want to

know more about Yuki and his life. But this was too much. After finishing reading the book and

the papers inside, he put it perfectly back on the laptop the way it was so Yuki wouldn't know.

He was about to leave when he saw a picture hidden under the laptop. He looked at it and after

what he read, it didn't surprise him. However, he stared at the picture for a long time before

snapping out of it. After reading and seeing these things that Yuki kept from him for how long,

Shuuichi was really upset. Teary eyed and heartbroken, Shuuichi walked to his room and

crawled into bed. He cried himself quietly to sleep.  
-----------------

The next morning Shuuichi left to work early because he didn't want to see Yuki. Right now, he

just wanted time to think. Yuki was surprised how he wasn't woken up by his loud good morning

wake up calls but was grateful at the same time because he got to sleep in. Yuki's day was

perfect today. He didn't have to wake up early, Shuuichi didn't call him from work at all today and

neither did Tohma, and he hasn't gotten a visit from Mika pleading him to visit his parents in

Kyoto. All he had to do today was turn in his manuscript to his editor and was free the rest of

the day to do whatever he wanted.

In NG Productions, everyone was shocked at Shuuichi. He told Hiro his problem as he usually

does and all about the things he read that Yuki never told him and should have. But the reason

why everyone was shocked was because he didn't cry or whine. Instead, Shuuichi was able to

write all the lyrics for the upcoming album and sang perfectly today without any complaints. He

was doing better than what he usually did even though he was depressed. Hiro thought Shuuichi

expressed himself in his lyrics and in his singing instead of whining which was better and unlike

Shuuichi. It seemed to relieve Shuuichi and he felt good about it. Even though they finished

everything perfectly and without any problems, they still left work kind of late since Shuuichi

wanted to stay and practice, probably trying to avoid Yuki. After they left, he asked Hiro to hang

out with him a bit and later, they grabbed a bite to eat at a small not-too-fancy restaurant. Back

at Yuki's place, he wondered what took Shuuichi so long to come home. Then he thought that it

didn't matter even if he was bored, he didn't want the brat to come home and annoy him.  
---------------

A quarter to midnight, Shuuichi comes home. Yuki is in his study as usual. Usually, Shuuichi

would think that Yuki is typing his story but now knew how wrong he was and now knew what

Yuki was really writing about. "Yuki, I'm home." He said, not too loudly and not too happily

either. He sounded like he didn't want to be there and who could blame him after finding out what

he did. Yuki didn't answer him and Shuuichi wasn't expecting one. He took off his bag and

flopped lazily onto the couch. He didn't want to sleep in the bedroom, so he would go to sleep

right here. This would be the first night Shuuichi didn't eat at home or play video games before

going to sleep. He didn't care. A couple of minutes later, Yuki came out and saw Shuuichi laying

down on the couch under a blue blanket with only his pink hair on the pillow sticking out. "Are

you awake?" He asked quietly. Shuuichi shook his head 'yes' without taking off the blanket.

"You're not going to eat or play your games?" Yuki asked surprised. Again, Shuuichi shook his

head, this time 'no'. Yuki sat next to Shuuichi and looked at him. "You leave work early and you

come home late. You tell me your home very quietly and don't even come into the study. Now

you don't want to eat and you're not playing games. Something's wrong. What is it?" Yuki

asked, hoping he didn't sound to concerned. Shuuichi poked his head out of the blanket and

stared at Yuki. "Nothing." He said as he looked away and lay back down. "Shuuichi-" "Yuki, do

you love me?" Yuki was taken back by this question. Shuuichi sounded serious this time. Yuki

didn't answer him though. "I thought so. Your silence says enough." Shuuichi buried his head

back under the blanket. "What's that suppose to mean-" "Don't lie to me anymore, Yuki. I know

everything. I don't want to hear anymore lies and excuses! I saw the papers last night. I read all

of it. The book too." Shuuichi cut him off and tightened his hold on the blanket as if it would

protect him.

Yuki was pissed off now. He couldn't believe Shuuichi snuck into his study. Not only that, but he

also went snooping around in his things and saw what he didn't want Shuuichi to see. "You

know you're not allowed in there. And who gave you permission to go through my things?" Yuki

sounded angrier then he usually gets. This time, it was serious. "No one. But it doesn't matter

now. I know the truth. Why didn't you tell me? I thought you cared for me!" Shuuichi said quickly

jumping out from under the blanket and sat facing Yuki, tears threatening to fall. "I kind of

thought you new from the way I acted towards you. But you never seem to get the picture." Yuki

was only being sarcastic but Shuuichi was so upset hat he didn't catch the sarcasm in his voice

and took it seriously. The tears that stung the edge of his eyes finally rolled down his cheek and

off his chin. Yuki reached out a hand to wipe Shuuichi's tears but he smacked Yuki's hand

away, allowing his tears to fall freely. He wanted to make Yuki feel guilty and regret what he did.

"Don't touch me!" Shuuichi was serious.

He didn't cry and complain his usual way because he knew that all the things Yuki said were

now all true. Yuki narrowed his eyes and stared at Shuuichi. "How much do you know?" "All of

it! I know that you still care for-" He paused. "...Kitazawa Yuki. That you're still in love with

that dead guy who harasses you. That you hate me and wish you never met me! You wish

Kitazawa was still alive so you wouldn't have to be with me... And you never... Once cared

for me. You never think of me. If you do... They're thoughts like, "Shuuichi's annoying," "Why

don't he just disappear from my life and leave me the hell alone," and one thought you wished

I... Died. Sniff You want to rid of me and be with him. Personally... I think I'm better than

Kitazawa. I healed you and cared for you and stayed by your side when others... Didn't. I even

know the reason why Tohma was always so cold to me. Because... You told him to since he

would do anything for you, Eiri. You like everyone... Except me! Why? Why don't you care for

m- Why am I not loved?" Shuuichi finally broke down into tears and buried his face in his hands.

He cried uncontrollably, unable to speak further. He wanted to say more but- "Is that what you

really believe? You're no better than he was. If you were, you would have left me alone from the

beginning. Instead, you stayed and made me suffer not heal. If anything, you made my life

worse." Yuki's word cut deep. "I only wanted to make you happy. I never meant to hurt you!"

Now Shuuichi was yelling too much that he could taste blood in his throat. "Make me happy?

Well you never once made me happy. Why do you think I kick you out all the time or yell at you

or that I'm happy when you're not around."

Shuuichi brought his head up from his hands long enough to glare at Yuki as if that look alone

could kill him. He hated Yuki so much right now and wanted him out of his sight. "Leave me

alone. I hate you, Yuki!" "That's a new one. You promised you'd always love me, didn't you?"

Yuki said, coldly. "I take it back! Maybe you belong with someone like Kitazawa after all. You

sure as hell don't deserve me! It would've been better if he were still alive so that the bastard

could suffer living with you in my place!" "Shut the hell up! You damn annoying spoiled little

brat!" Yuki yelled and Shuuichi flinched at his sudden outburst. Yuki got up and Shuuichi hid

under the blanket like it were a shield since he thought Yuki was going to hit him. Instead, Yuki

walked by him without another word and went to the room and slammed the door shut. Shuuichi

was hurt and upset beyond recover. He still cried uncontrollably. He lay back down, his body

under the blanket and his head under the pillow. "I hate you, Yuki." was the last thing he

murmured. Once again, he cried himself quietly to sleep, tear soaking the pillow and couch.  
-----------------------

Around one thirty in the morning, a little while after their fight, Yuki comes out of his room and

into the living room. He looked down at Shuuichi was just barely sleeping. He was restlessly

sleeping. Shuuichi was still crying in his sleep. The blanket wasn't fully on him, so Yuki covered

him and Shuuichi mumbled, "Yuki, why don't you love me when I... Care for you so much?"

and turned over to the other side facing Yuki but still asleep. Yuki gently wiped the tears from

Shuuichi's face and brushed a lock of pink hair from his eyes. He gave Shuuichi a kiss on the

cheek and whispered in his ear, "That's the last kiss you'll get from me. Farewell, Shuuichi."

And with that, Yuki walked out the door, never to be seen by Shuuichi or anyone he knew here

again.


	2. Imprudent

Gravitation  
A/N: Thankyou all for you support and reviews.Like I said before, review whether good or bad, they are appreciated because it helps me improve my work to your liking. Please keep sending in those reviews. I'd like to hear from you. This chapter was kind of off, it didn't come out the way I wanted it to but I guess it's good enough. I will make up for it in the next chapter so please keep reading. Hope I haven't let anyone down!  
Title: Clueless  
Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Gravi TT  
Chapter 2: Imprudent

Normal POV

The morning after the fight between Yuki and Shuuichi, Shuuichi awoke to an empty apartment.

Shuuichi was kind of relieved that Yuki wasn't there but then he was upset because he wanted

to talk to him. Shuuichi wanted an explanation from Yuki. But then he realized it didn't matter.

Nothing Yuki did or said would make Shuuichi trust him and believe him again. It's been a week

since Yuki left and Shuuichi's been skipping work. Since that fight, he hasn't eaten or drinking

anything and hasn't spoken to anyone. He didn't even leave the house. Instead, Shuuichi's been

staying wrapped up tightly under the blanket on the couch in the dark, empty apartment all by

himself. He would breakdown into tears about every hour or so and when he cried, he cried for a

long time. Over and over again, Shuuichi would see the images of the fight that occurred a week

ago. They kept playing over in his mind whether he was awake or asleep like a broken record.

These images hurt him more and more each time he saw it. The memories made Shuuichi hate

Yuki more. The reason Shuuichi didn't move from that spot on the couch was because he would

be reminded of something he'd done with Yuki and he was in too much pain as it was.

Already eight O' clock at night, Shuuichi finally decides to get up. He gets dressed in a blue

tank top and short brown shorts. He leaves without a jacket and starts walking aimlessly around

the streets in the rain. He doesn't care where he's going or where he ends up. Shuuichi hopes

he doesn't bump into anyone he knows. He stopped at a bar and decided to have a few drinks.

Shuuichi wasn't much of a drinker but he was really depressed and didn't care. About 3 drinks

later, Shuuichi leaves the bar. It's raining harder out then it was before. He was to weak to walk

and had to stop walking to vomit. Of course he'd be this way. He didn't eat for days and then he

goes out and drinks alcohol on an empty stomach. Right now Shuuichi was completely

defenseless. With his luck, he had to be attacked now of all times. When he couldn't protect

himself.

A tall person came up behind him and pulled Shuuichi's arms behind his back. Someone slightly

shorter came out of the dark alley behind them. "Yo, Shuuichi. Long time no see. I'm her for my

revenge." Shuuichi struggled to get out of the taller mans grip but couldn't. It was too dark out for

him to tell who the person was standing in front of him. The man pulled out a pocket knife and

held it up to Shuuichi's cheek. "What a lover you got. He ratted you out. I knew your

whereabouts because he told me. I was going to look for you at his apartment but it's much

more convenient for you to be out now. It's easier to get to you. Saves me a lot of trouble. You

could thank Eiri Yuki for what happens to you tonight." He licked his lips and forced Shuuichi

into a kiss. Shuuichi tried to break free but this only caused the man behind him to push him

onto the floor. The taller man slammed his foot into Shuuichi's stomach and held it there so he

couldn't move. "You've stopped fighting back. What's wrong?" The other man said. At this point,

Shuuichi broke down into tears yet again. "You've lost your will to live, haven't you? I guess it

means that you and that Eiri has gotten into another fight but it hurts you more that he let us

come after you instead of protecting you. 'Guess he never cared for you, heh." Shuuichi winced

at this, knowing the mans words were true. "Yuki... Doesn't care about me. I don't care what

you do to me anymore... Take your revenge on me as much as you want." Shuuichi said

between sobs, finally realizing who it was. "You giving me permission and not fighting back

takes out all the fun. But if that's the way you want it..."

Shuuichi screamed in pain as the guy stabbed him the shoulder and sliced him in random

places. Shuuichi was now lying on the cold, wet floor in a pool of his blood. "Yo, Taki, we gotta

get outa here!" A guy called from the end of the street. "Well, I guess that's all for now. But I'll

find you again, Shuichi. Be aware that I'm watching you." With that, Taki left Shuuchi to soak in

his own blood. Shuuichi wanted to cry but it hurt his chest to much because of the cuts Taki

gave him. Now, not only was it raining but it started to thunder and lightning showed. Shuuichi

struggled to get up. When he managed to get to his feet, he slowly walked back to the

apartment. 'I knew I shouldn't have left the apartment. Someone help me. I can't go on.' He

thought. Now he hoped someone he knew would be out there. He knew for sure Yuki wasn't

coming to his rescue. Yuki is the one who allowed Taki and his gang to attack him. 'That

bastard. I'll never forgive him.' Even though Yuki was gone, he still made Shuuichi suffer, but

worse than before.

When Shuuichi got back to the apartment, he saw it was all trashed. Things were missing.

Things that Yuki needed, which means Yuki came back for it while he was getting beat up. On

top of that, Yuki trashed the place, leaving the mess for him to clean. Yuki only took the things

most important to him and if he didn't come for Shuuichi and let him get hurt, obviously,

Shuuichi wasn't among Yuki's important things. Shuuichi's legs could no longer support him and

he fell face first onto the couch and brought the covers over him. The door to the apartment was

left wide opened revealing a helpless Shuuichi who was now unconscious, on the couch.

Anyone could get in and kill him. But, it seemed as though Shuuichi welcomed death. After all

that's happened, he had no reason to go on.  
------------------------  
When Shuuichi came to the first thing he saw were big, worried blue eyes staring at him. It was

Tohma. Shuuichi tried to sit up but winced and fell back down. He vaguely remembered the

happenings of the night before and knew why he was in so much pain. Shuuichi looked around

and saw that the apartment was cleaned up and light was shining in through the windows. He

was bandaged up and dressed in clean white pajama's. He looked at Tohma. "Shuuichi, What

happened to you?" Tohma asked him worriedly. "Why are you here, Tohma?" Shuuichi avoided

his question with a question of his own.

Flashback

Tohma walks up to Eiri's apartment and notices the door is opened. Seeing this, he runs up to

the door and pushes it further open. He comes in and sees the apartment is a wreck. "Eiri!

Shindou-san! Is anyone here?" He yells for them. No one answers. Tohma panics. Then he sees

a blood covered hand from underneath the blue covers hanging off the couch. He runs up to the

couch and pulls of the covers. "Oh my god,no. Shindou-san, Shindou-san, who did this to you?

Wake up, Shindou-san!" No answer. Tohma grabs the phone and calls the hospital. A nurse and

a doctor was immediately sent over and tended to Shuuichi's wounds. He wasn't injured badly

enough to be brought to the hospital. Luckily enough, he didn't need a blood transfusion after all

the blood loss either.

End Flashback

Shuuichi's POV

"I'm here because no one's been answering the phone and you haven't been coming to work. I

thought something happened and I was right when I came here and saw you in the condition you

were in. What exactly happened to you? Does it have something to do with Eiri?" Tohma was

looking at me with an even more worry filled expression than before. I looked away. I couldn't

face him, not when I would have to tell him about Eiri and besides that, his expression was too

painful. I would never dare think that Tohma would look at me this way. "Tohma, Yuki doesn't

care for me... At all. I thought loved me even if he didn't show it, but-" I could no longer hold back

my tears. I didn't want Tohma to see e this way. "Did Eiri do this to you?" His voice was filled

with shock. I slowly shook my head 'no' and cupped my head in my hands and continued to cry.

"In a way, he did but didn't. Taki gave me these physical wounds but what hurts most is that

Yuki let him. We got into a fight last week and he hasn't come home since. But he told Taki

where to find me and he knew what Taki was going to do but didn't care. I... Haven't heard from

him and I don't want to... I don't want to see him ever again. I'm scared... Tohma, you're not

angry at me, are you? It... Wasn't my fault..." I could no longer keep control of my voice or my

movements. The next thing I knew I was crying uncontrollably into Tohma's chest.

When I calmed down, I told Tohma everything that happened the best I could without crying. He

said that he will find Taki and have him pay for what he's done to me. Tohma is also very pissed

at Yuki but not as much as I am. He told Mika and let her know that he would be staying here to

take care of me in my time of need. I told him that it wasn't necessary because I could have Hiro

stay with me. Tohma wouldn't hear of it. He wanted to be here in case Yuki came back so that

he could protect this time and possibly get some answers from him. Right now, it didn't matter

who was with me, nothing mattered anymore.


End file.
